Fit2BeMyself: Diary of a Woman Seeking Wellness

I recently posted an essay to my main blog, Life in a Few Words  that I feel also fits in with the theme of this blog. Here's a snippet of it: Trigger Warning: There is some discussion of domestic violence, sexual abuse, and depression in this article .  The views expressed here are my own. Recently, I watched some  videos on YouTube  about the DeBarge family. Several of the family members had some success as the musical group  DeBarge  in the 1980s. I have seen other documentaries and read articles about the history of this family, but this telling of the DeBarges’ story sat with me different. The YouTuber I watched is a good storyteller, but even if she had been terrible, the Debarge story is sensational enough to have had the same effect. In short, the children suffered unthinkable abuse at the hands of their father. Most of them grew up to become addicts, marry abusive partners, and even abuse each other.   Like many people, I u...

Here's my pandemic/over-the-road driver body that I acquired in 2020. A lot happened last year for everybody, but I had my share of personal victories. Unfortunately, the pandemic and the time I spent on the road took away a lot of time that I would've spent dancing and strength training.  The past few weeks I've been reacquainting myself with my yoga mat (I have a cuter one now) and I'm not quite as graceful as I once was. Anything that requires me to "ground" or "root" myself throws off my balance, which, I think, is one of the reasons such asanas exist. A reminder to steady yourself. It'll all come back together soon enough, my weight and athleticism, I have the gift of muscle memory on my side, but I must say that this is the best I have felt in a long time.

We all have our reasons for why we may fall off the exercise wagon. My reasons were the Covid-19 quarantine, a job as an over-the-road expediter, and most recently, taking a month to help care for my uncle who was battling cancer. Long story short, my yoga mat has been missing me, the weight has piled on, and now I have lower back pain.  The past year and a half has taken as much of an emotional toll on me as it has a physical toll. It has been killing me mentally to not be able to go to the dance studio as I was once able to because of everything that has gone on in my life. Although the job I had brought in a nice salary, it left absolutely no time for anything else, not even the ability to be a present parent. Now that most of the dust has settled, I am going to pick up where I left off in reclaiming my body and treating it well. I started by going back to the basics: a brief yoga video on YouTube that is led by yoga instructor Jessamyn Stanley. When I first saw her I immediatel...

Where have I been? Where am I now? Those are very good, potentially philosophical, questions. I have been away from my blogs for quite some time, but I have still been writing. As of the writing of this little personal essay, I was touring Paisley Park yesterday and I am leaving my hair behind in a hotel trash can outside of Minneapolis after I decided on a spur of the moment big chop. Click here to read the rest of this post on my main blog.

At the time of this post, Covid-19 is still rampant and I'm trying to social distance as much as I can. I still go out for walks 2-3 times per week, but if you've read my other posts, then you know that yoga is my thing. Try this stretch with me. I'm in a shoebox-sized space with a five-year-old sleeping just a few feet away from me, but I told myself there would be no excuses. There's always room for a good stretch! View this post on Instagram It has been a while since I posted a video of myself. I'm currently in a shoebox-sized space, but I still make room to stretch as much as I can and keep my yoga muscles in shape. It also helps me sleep better. No excuses. #yoga #yogaeverydamnday #plussizefitness #plussizeyoga #stretching #stretch #treepose #warriorpose A post shared by LeTara Moore (@fit2bemyself) on May 5, 2020 at 7:19pm PDT

I have seen many memes and jokes over the past several weeks about how 2020 has been a terrible year so far. I agree. This year began with my mother passing away from heart failure and a laundry list of other ailments on January 9, 2020. I wasn’t expecting the death of Kobe Bryant to affect me as much as it did considering I wasn’t a basketball fan, but just knowing that he and the others who died with him had families, dreams, and lives to live, and the fact that it happened the same month that I lost my mother, made it an extremely emotional event for me. Now, as of the writing of this post, we are amid the global pandemic COVID-19. Finding any type of normalcy since my mom was first hospitalized in July 2019 has been a task I have been failing at. My workouts fell by the wayside. My suffering finances suffered even more. My mental struggles almost got the best of me on a few different occasions. Now, as you may have heard from numerous sources, is a time to...

I have lost count of the number of times that I've pressed the reset button on my life. It used to something that I'd beat myself up about, but I've realized that if I want to continue living that I'd have to start over as many times as necessary.  Life isn't always the way we would like for it to be. I think almost anyone who has ever lived would agree with that statement. I started this blog with great expectations but things happened. I haven't even been to the dance studio in months because of those things. Between being a caregiver for my sick mother, being a mother myself, trying and failing to pay all my bills on time, and having my own brief stint in the hospital, this past year has not been worth bragging about. However, I'm still here. I hope that despite whatever struggles you have had, you will continue pressing forward, too.  Many grand ideas have crossed my mind over the years, but executing has always been an issue. I thought...